Suggestions for the city’s ‘lakes’

I attended a Kinni Corridor Project meeting Oct. 5; it was most enlightening.

Until I went to the meeting, I was in favor of the dam removal and the restoration of the river’s natural flow through our city. After all, we’re the “City on the Kinni,” right?

Know what a charrette is?

Neither did I, so I looked it up. The first thing that struck me was that our city planners – who I thought were unelected and unaccountable bureaucrats – had been charretting like crazy. Obviously, a lot of time (if not thought) has gone into the development of the charrette.

I now see that I needed an attitude adjustment. I needed to see Lake George and Lake Louise as the treasures they really are, and not as the muck and silt depositories they appear to be.

To help others find this reality:

► Change our inviting motto from “City on the Kinni” to “River Falls – City of Lakes.” It’s worked for Minneapolis and Minocqua.

► Change the dates and arrangement of our “Art on the Kinni” attraction from September to late July and have it circle Lake George. Visiting artists could not only enjoy the visual beauty of the lake, they could smell it too. Artists are sensual
people.

► A new event, “The Carpenter Classic.” Sportsmen from all over the Midwest would flock to this event. Rods and reels would be optional as dip nets would scoop up floating fish. A citywide fish fry could be part of the final day’s award ceremony.

► Baptisms! What proud city resident wouldn’t want their newborn submerged in our lakes’ tranquil waters? Sinners of any age should have this ritual made available to them.

► Canoe/kayak rental! Imagine the revenue our city might garner from people looking to this wilderness experience! Better if Eskimo rolls are discouraged.

► The Goose Poop Bonanza! Another new event. Sometime in the fall, Scouts, 4-Hers and band members could collect floating goose poop as a contest and fundraiser. Dead geese, ducks, cats and dogs could also be collected but entered in a separate category.

► Pearl diving! Who knows what has settled to the bottom of our natural wonder? I’ve seen cans, bottles, condoms, golf balls, rakes, bikes, etc. there. There must be a pearl in there somewhere.

Timm Anderson
River Falls

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